excerpt from If You Want It by Relient K

"Blisters on my feet I crawled back home
Frozen from the sleet burned sand and stones
Nourished back to life by life alone
With one shake of the mane regain the throne"

For you.

it's been a long long time
since I saw you last
staying the same, all same
like the day you left

it's been a long long time
since I fell in love
I feel long long day
today somehow

float in your eyes
tears on the sly
sky in the pond
fades out

it's been a long long time
since I met you first
I was a shadow cast by your sun
everytime you looked into my eyes
dear, won't you come back again
catch me if I'm falling, so long

are you real real real real
do you feel feel butterfly

it's been a long long day
since I saw you last
fears falling down
and never touch the ground
dear, won't you come back someday
make the illusion go away, so long

it's been a long long day

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Now playing: Akeboshi - Sky in the pond
via FoxyTunes

Reading out of context

I suppose it is easy for a non-believer to read the bible out of context and miss the whole philosophy behind the statement. Romans 12:19 is not telling people to not think for themselves. It is also not saying don't worry about it because it "will be handled by divine retribution". If you roll back through the entire chapter (and know the entire book), you'd know that this chapter is about doing the Lords service. We will all go on to be persecuted, but we shouldn't repay evil with evil. And in reality, "divine retribution" is no different that the concept of Karma.
My concept of justice is not just because I'm not all knowing, nor am I sinless. I am called to love. And, though I struggle with finding love for people who hurt me, I recognize that this is part of the calling of my life. This is not just a "religion". This is a faith in something other than myself. Something that I've seen first hand. And it is hard to understand if you are still hiding behind your fear of religion, and still living your life without taking a step of faith.
I understand science. I do not avoid its understanding just because I believe my god lovingly created me. I also understand that signs often point to different things. Science is trial and error. Philosophically, science relies on faith as well. Some areas even rely on contradicting statements and circular reasoning. A scientist needs just as much faith as a "religious" person, and yet us "religious" folk are constantly seen as blind.
Any way... I'm getting off subject. My point is... I believe that there is a God. He sent his son down to die for me. I believe we are all sinners, including myself. The only path that leads to heaven is a belief that Jesus loved us enough to make the ultimate sacrifice.
To a science man, all of this makes no sense. But, then again, this man has not stepped out from what he "knows" and put a little effort in caring about the other side. This science man could see the science behind this faith. And yes, there is science involved. Even your blog supports this... read through slowly with an educated mind and you would see the sentence that supports my thought.
adieu

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Now playing: Five Iron Frenzy - World Without End
via FoxyTunes

3:30 a.m.

What am I doing up at 3:30 a.m.? Well, I can't sleep. I suppose I'm just not feeling a 100%, but really my mind is racing and here I am. I'm not stressed about anything in particular, just my usual. My eyelids are heavy every time I blink and yet here I am. For the most part, wide awake. At some point in the night, I even got up and took a hot shower...

I've started like 3 new paragraphs all to trail off into "meh"... I believe I may just have nothing to talk about. I'm thinking this might have some thing to do with the fact that I'm still physically and mentally tired and yet completely unable to sleep. My thoughts are scattered. Not a good time for venting my thoughts.

Happy August. I hope it treats me well. Bring me a new beginning.

Thinking of you.

I look at the stars and I see my creator.
I see his love.
I hope that you will see it too... someday.

"Zombies in my living room. I don't want to be consumed"

Todays Tunes: Zombies by Maxwell Smart

What am I feeling?: blank

Maybe I keep too much bottled up. Its hard to share your feelings when you don't like to be the center of attention. I don't thrive on people knowing all my business... at least the more personal parts of it. Sure you may know that I love the color purple and have a tiny obsession with zombie flicks, but do you know my middle name? Some of my best friends literally have no clue. And even here, I won't really tell you what I'm feeling or thinking. I'm busy worrying about people's feelings.

Music is the Best Therapy

I'm known for blasting music with my cute pink skull candy headphones and sinking into the lyrics of my favorite songs. I remember having my first cd player. It was in 4th grade. It was a 3 disc cd changer with huge speakers that I would blast homemade recordings of the radio. "Awesome mix 42". I'm definitely my father's daughter.
I think I have a song for every era of my life. And for this, I am like my mother. "This song brings me back to 6th grade." Each song can bring back a memory in vivid HD color. I can remember ever feeling and emotion I felt at the time. Sometimes it will hit me like a wave. Songs that remind me of a loss, whether it is a lost life or a lost relationship.
I can't help but rely on music when things are rough. I have certain cds that I cycle through relentlessly according to my mood.
Currently, I'm listening to my accoustic playlist. It includes various artists but, my favorites are Marcus Foster and Bobby Long.



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Now playing: Marcus Foster - Same Old Dance
via FoxyTunes